how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Randomize