I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.