Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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