I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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