Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Gay?
German.
Pity.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
