he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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