i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
