this boner is exhausting
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
