Im at strip club and am horny
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
