honey bunches of taint.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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