Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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