Nicole vs. Life
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
