I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
