jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
