i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize