"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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