evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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