There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
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