Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
