Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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