I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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