So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize