next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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