Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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