You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize