i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
3 2 1 whiskey
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
