what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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