ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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