You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You need a sexual gate keeper
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
