How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
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My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
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All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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