im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Buhtt sex?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
