It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
