You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
honey bunches of taint.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
