In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
