Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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