Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
