just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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