Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
