party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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