i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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