He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
