I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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