I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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