he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I need water and some morals
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
