i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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