rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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