Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
