He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
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