there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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