This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize