you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
