weddingsv make me drug and hornr
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
This is the high leading the old right now
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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